*Two blondes** living in * *Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and **
One blonde says to the other, ‘Which do you think is farther away…
Florida or the moon** ?*
*T**he other blonde turns and says ‘Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida
???*
*CAR **
TROUBLE*
*A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the **
Mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling
smoothly. *
*She says, ‘What’s the story?’ *
*He replies, ‘Just crap in the carburetor’*
*She asks, ‘How often do I have to do that?’*
*SPEEDING **
TICKET*
*A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if
he could see her license. *
*She replied in a huff, ‘I wish you guys would get your act together. **
Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to
show it to you!’*
*RIVER **
WALK*
*There’s this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another
blonde on the opposite bank ‘Yoo-hoo!’ she shouts, ‘How can I get to the
other side?’*
*The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back,
‘You ARE on the other side.’*
*AT THE DOCTOR’S OFFICE*
*A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor’s office and said that her
body hurt wherever she touched it..*
*’Impossible!’ says the doctor. ‘Show me.’ *
*The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed,
then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and
screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she
touched made her scream. *
*The doctor said, ‘You’re not really a redhead, are you? *
*’Well, no’ she said, ‘I’m actually a blonde.’ *
*’I thought so,’ the doctor said, ‘Your finger is broken.’*
*KNITTING*
* *
*A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the
wheel was knitting!*
*Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the
trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, ‘PULL
OVER!’ *
*’NO!’ the blonde yelled back, ‘IT’S A SCARF!*
*IN A **
VACUUM*
*A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.. It was her turn. She
rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, ‘If
you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?’ She
thought for a time and then asked, ‘Is it on or off?’*
*FINALLY, **
THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!*
*A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and
asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one
was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, ‘Whoever heard
of someone naming dogs like that** **?** ЕЕЕ..** ‘HELLLOOOOOOO……,’
answered the blonde. ‘They’re **watch **dogs***